Keywords:: PermanentNote makePublic
Reference:: conversation with friends and
At the highest level of competition there's a little margin for error.
If you want to win in business, you need to solve problems in the most effective way. To solve problems effectively, you need to get to the truth as quickly as possible. And the best way to get to the truth is to be candid with each other.
Candor doesn't mean saying everything you think, it means being honest about your thoughts and feelings in a way that leads to productive insights, which allow you to get to the truth of the issue at hand.
Sometimes the issue at hand is something related to a person's performance on a task, project, problem they were supposed to solve, etc. This situation usually requires constructive criticism with the goal of determining what went wrong, why it did, how to fix it, and how to prevent it from repeating. This, however, can sometimes result in friction between people. [1]
In most cases, people react to constructive criticisms in one of two ways: they either take it personally or professionally.
In the first case, they get defensive and either react emotionally to the feedback or suppress their feelings until they accumulate and burst out in the future. But the result is the same: they stop listening to what's being said and only focus on how they feel.
The second case is more constructive. These people listen to the feedback, analyze it, and try to determine if there's any merit to it. If they think the feedback is valid, they'll work to improve their performance. If they don't, they'll explain why they disagree with the feedback. This in turn prepares the ground for a productive discussion that allows both parties come closer to the truth.
Unfortunately, taking it personally is the most common reaction to receiving feedback.
Usually, it's related to character rather than situation—people who get offended once will get offended second time. It may relate to growth versus fixed mindset. [2][3] [4]
Since we're people not robots, we don't want to make people feel bad, so we try to change the delivery of the feedback, adjust the relationships to the person, try to be less harsh, etc. This might work for a time, but the truth is, it rarely works in the long term.
It slows you down.
The reality is that if the person can't handle constructive cricism, they're not designed for the competitive environment. Work isn't a dinner party or a date; it's a fucking war. If you don't perform, you die. Simple as that. You need not be afraid to hurt feelings, if it aids getting to the truth
Other, if you're a person to whom giving and receiving candid information, no matter it's emotional load, not acting this way will slowly wear you down.
It may risk that the org will become that way,
Dailio's quote: "Don’t worry if your people like you; worry about whether you are helping your people to be great."
Connect to No Rules Rules.
Form of delivery shouldn't be an issue at work. (I'm not talking about personal life).
An important thing you have to do as a leader is to make it clear that the culture of candor, bluntness, frankness isn't there to hurt people. It exists to shorten the road to truth to perform at the highest level.
Relevant notes (PN: )
2 PN: The growth mindset: pleasure from mistakes; treating mistakes as information, not something that makes us feel depressed.
4 P: Convert the ‘pain’ of seeing your mistakes and weaknesses into pleasure.: Dalio calls people who welcome feedback self-reflective people. Errors are a natural part of innovation—you should expect them—so there's nothing wrong with making mistakes. What's wrong, however, not identifying, analyzing, and learning from them.